Ya know, there are just some days when you just don't want talk...or really you do, but you feel no one really cares to listen.
Much of the time, my blogging helps me to say what I want to say, to an audience that's always 'listening'. When I'm talking here, I don't have to watch for body language which tells me the listener is bored, getting angry, impatient, etc. Plus, anyone reading who isn't interested can 'walk away' and I won't even know it. I can just keep on 'talking' until I'm done. And for me, that's a good thing. Sometimes I have things to say....
Body language is a BIG THING for me...and it can make me feel unimportant in a heartbeat. Now, I know that much of that has to do with myself and my "low self-esteem", but don't you think that the person on the receiving end has some responsibility, too? When we're in a conversation, isn't it polite to respond, to look at the person, and to give the speaker a chance to complete his/her thought before throwing up our hands in frustration or "throwing in the towel" so to speak? I have to say I get a bit peeved when a person asks me a question then doesn't wait to hear the answer. They go on with another topic or leave the room....why ask the question at all, then? I will never understand it. And what about that verse in the bible that talks about never letting the sun go down on your anger? Boy have I spent many a night with unresolved issues (and I don't mean just between my husband and I, though that's been the case too). It's really hard to do when only one of you is willing to talk.
I have things to work on...that's obvious. Don't we all?
Today's one of those days of reflection, questioning, and wondering where it's all going to end up. What is my purpose, my calling in life? Is it what I'm doing? Is there something more? And to whom should I speak about it, if anyone? Does it just require more prayer and better listening on my part? Do you know?